TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
• You have two cows.
• You sell one and buy a bull.
• Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows
.• You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
• You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A SOUTH AFRICAN CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
• You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.A BRITISH CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• Both are mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
• You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
• You break for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• You count them and learn you have five cows.
• You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
• You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
• You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION
• You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
• You charge others for storing them.

A HINDU CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• You worship them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• You have 300 people milking them.
• You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.

AN ISRAELI CORPORATION
• So, there are these two Jewish cows, right?
• They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights.
• They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?

A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
• You have two cows.
• That one on the left is kinda cute... so are the sheep.

ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM:
• You have two cows.
• You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
• The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells, the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
• The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
• Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows.• No balance sheet provided with the release.
• The public buys your bull.